


Batman & Jongin

by wertstoffhof (roachprince)



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: AU oneshot, Humor, M/M, is that a thing? i'm making it a thing, low-key college AU, meet ugly-cute, other exo members and ex members and shinee members are mentioned briefly, smut is hinted at, unrealistically frequent costume parties
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-05
Updated: 2017-03-05
Packaged: 2018-09-28 14:15:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,642
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10113788
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/roachprince/pseuds/wertstoffhof
Summary: Kyungsoo and Jongin meet while waiting at the emergency room, dressed up as Batman and Robin.





	

**Author's Note:**

> for kai (my kai, not exo's kai), who loves kaisoo, rowlet, banana milk, and me.  
> happy birthday. ♥

He saw him earlier. Somewhere in the mass of writhing bodies in Junmyeon’s living room, he saw him. He would have been easy to overlook, small and kind of scrawny and a costume that’s almost entirely black, drowned out quickly by literally everybody else around him, but Jongin saw him.

Well, most of all he saw him because Sehun kept pointing in his direction and shouting something in Jongin’s ear he still didn’t understand even after the third attempt. But then everyone else also kept pointing at the guy in the black costume and it clicked, and over the course of the evening, it just kind of kept happening. People kept pointing to the boy in the Batman costume (that low-key looks like it’s from the kids’ section) and asking Jongin if that’s his friend. People kept asking if they came here together, wiggling their eyebrows, since their costumes match.

Taemin talked him into this. Jongin knows just enough about comics to know who Batman and Robin are, but Taemin knows enough to tell him that there are actually four Robins, or even a lot more, depending on how you count them, and that they all get different outfits. And Taemin knows enough about spring costume parties with a bunch of horny college kids to tell Jongin to pick the one that doesn’t even have tights. The one that’s basically just a green Speedo with some boots, a shirt, and a dorky cape. So, the one that’s going to leave his legs naked.

Jongin has to admit, he’s been getting some glances that are doing wonders for his ego. Truly, tonight he’s learning the importance of underlining your good body parts with your costume.

Batman’s mask only covers the top part of his face. It leaves the lips free, which, Jongin guesses, is no problem as long as Batman is Ben Affleck or Christian Bale, some generic white dude you honest to god wouldn’t recognize with a mask. This guy, though, the one people kept pointing at while yelling into Jongin’s ear, he’d make a bad Batman. His lips are plush and big and basically _round_ , with a defined Cupid’s bow Jongin could probably still see from a mile away, so no, wearing a mask that only covers half his face would not help this dude at all if he were to take up vigilantism.

He’s not wearing the mask right now anyway. No, Jongin just kept thinking about seeing him in the crowd at Junmyeon’s party, because that was a lot nicer than where he is right now.

His foot hurts. Sehun has passed out sprawled over three plastic chairs in the waiting area of the emergency room, Jongin’s still pretty much naked legs are sticking to his own uncomfortable plastic chair, he’s at least half sure that there’s beer drying on his cape, and his foot hurts, and when he came in here, the waiting area was empty save for a little kid holding his bleeding nose. He’s gone now, but sometime between there and Sehun falling asleep on him, Tiny Batman emerged from one of the rooms, gave him a slightly puzzled look, and sat down across from him.

So now his foot hurts, and Tiny Batman isn’t wearing his mask anymore, Jongin can see the rest of his face which is so beautiful it’s almost embarrassing Jongin in some stupid, teenager-y way, Sehun is still fucking asleep, and he’s sitting in an emergency room in the middle of the night where no doctor seems to be taking any particular sort of interest in him and his pain.

He only realizes he’s staring when it’s too late and Tiny Batman is already raising one thick brow at him. Jongin jumps in his seat, which feels weird with the underside of his thighs still very much sticking to the chair, opens his mouth and tries to come up with something smart to say, but all that comes out is, “Why are you here? You look great.”

Good. Good going, Kim Jongin.

“Fine!” he blurts out after that. Jongin hasn’t had nearly enough to drink to blame alcohol for his acute verbal diarrhea, but maybe Tiny Batman doesn’t know that. “I meant you look fine, did you get hurt?”

“No,” he replies, voice deep and fitting the Batman image much more than the rest of him, the corners of his mouth twitching upwards slightly. “I’m accompanying my friend.”

“Oh,” Jongin says. He throws a quick glance to his side, where one of Sehun’s arms is dangling off a plastic chair. “You’re doing a way better job than this dude.” Tiny Batman snorts softly at that, and Jongin feels heat creep up his neck. He feels awkward, but he’d feel more awkward dropping the conversation now and falling back into silence when they’re sitting across from each other and he just knows he’d keep staring at him. “What happened to your friend?”

“Ran into a glass door,” Tiny Batman says without even so much of a hint of pity. “Concussed, probably, and we’re pretty sure he somehow managed to break two fingers. Junmyeon really knows how to pick ‘em.” When Jongin just gives him a confused (and slightly worried) look, he adds, “Yifan. I bet you know him.”

“Ohh. Yeah, I know Yifan. I hope it’s nothing too bad,” Jongin says, but Batman just shrugs. He guesses that means Yifan must at least be somewhat okay? Either that, or the two of them have a very weird kind of friendship. “Hey, what was Yifan dressed up as, by the way?”

“I honestly have no idea. Looked weird, though. Maybe he just went as himself,” Batman deadpans. When Jongin laughs, his features soften just a little, and he smiles back. “You look fine, too? What are you doing here?”

“I gave someone a lap dance and slipped,” Jongin says, precisely one second before he wants to slap himself.

Batman opens his mouth for a very long moment before he says, “Oh.”

“I-I mean,” great, now he’s also stammering and clearing his throat, because this isn’t going bad enough already, “the guy kind of, like, grabbed my leg and that’s why I slipped and I think I might have twisted my ankle, that’s what happened.”

“Oh,” Batman says again, frowning this time. “That’s rude. Grabbing your leg, I mean. Who were you giving a lap dance to?”

“Um, I’m not sure,” Jongin says, feeling the heat from his neck spread to his ears. This is a catastrophe. “One of Taemin’s friends, I don’t know if you know him. He talked me into the outfit, too, it sort of derailed from there. You know, because of the legs.”

Batman’s gaze drops. Jongin can see it, can see him take in his naked legs (toned, too, if he says so himself) like it’s the first time he really sees them. “Yeah,” he says slowly, and Jongin has to fight a little to bite back a grin; this is better. This is good. This is giving him at least some of his confidence back after constantly making a fool of himself before. To be fair, Batman snaps out of it quickly and tugs at his own foam rubber breast plate. “My friends told me to wear this because apparently Batman can be a little disgruntled sometimes.”

Jongin smiles at him. “Are you a little disgruntled?”

And Batman smiles back. “Not right now, no.”

A door flies open. Jongin still has time to flinch before someone goes, “Kim Jongin?” and he blinks in the direction of the voice to find a doctor poking his head out. Finally.

“Yes, that’s me,” Jongin answers and carefully pushes himself off the chair, trying not to put too much weight on his foot.

“Your friend can come too, if he wants,” the doctor says. Jongin braces himself with one hand against the wall and throws him a confused look, then Sehun, still sleeping peacefully on three seats, before he realizes that that’s not what the doctor was looking at. He was looking at Tiny Batman.

He thinks they’re friends, because they’re Batman and Robin.

“O-Oh,” Jongin says and shakes his head. “No, he’s--”

But before he can finish, he pushes himself off the wall and tries walking towards the doctor, which results in him stumbling and almost falling back down towards the chairs, and Batman is with him in a millisecond. He holds him by the shoulders to stop him from toppling over, and then just throws him a meaningful glance that makes Jongin shut up in the middle of his sentence and let Batman help him limp into the examination room.

“I’m Do Kyungsoo, by the way,” Batman murmurs as they hobble through the door.

“Kim Jongin,” he says.

“I know. The doctor just said that.”

Jongin closes his eyes. This night is just not going his way.

  


At least his foot will be okay. It’s just a little sprained, he gets ointment and a bandage, then Kyungsoo helps him back out of the room. Jongin is just watching Sehun trying to figure out whether he should wake him up or just let him camp out in the ER for revenge, when another door opens and Wu Yifan strolls out holding a bandaged left hand.

“Yeah, they’re broken,” he announces to nobody in particular.

“I’m so proud of you,” Kyungsoo says dryly, then he throws Jongin, who is still pretty much leaning on his foam-cushioned shoulder, a careful look. “I’m gonna take Yifan home so he doesn’t walk into any more doors. You good?”

“Yeah, sure,” Jongin says automatically, because he doesn’t want to be a burden, and of course next thing he knows he wants to kick his own ass for letting Kyungsoo let go of him and side with Yifan instead. Good thing he sprained his ankle and can’t.

“See you around, then, Jongin,” Kyungsoo says and smiles at him over his shoulder. “Take care.”

“You too!” Jongin says. Kyungsoo is already walking towards the exit next to Yifan, who leans down and whispers something in Kyungsoo’s ear which makes Kyungsoo reach up and slap the back of his head. Jongin heaves a sigh. “Good night.”

Once they’re out the door, Sehun sits up like he was never really asleep in the first place, and Jongin squints at him suspiciously. Especially when the first thing he says is, “Did you get Batman’s number?”

Jongin grimaces. “No,” he says, and Sehun rolls his eyes so dramatically he has to tilt his entire head back.

“Jesus, okay. Well, good thing there’s another costume party coming up next month.”

  


He doesn’t know what his friends’ thing with costume parties is. Actually, Jongin fears it might have its roots in some sort of kinky nonsense involving masks and role plays, he’s never really sure with some of these guys, but with every costume party they throw, it gets less sexy and more messy. Nobody dresses up in hot skimpy outfits anymore, everybody just grabs whatever was left of last Halloween and gets wasted. Junmyeon and Jonghyun come in fully fledged, perfectly styled Naruto cosplays. Taemin and Sehun are Jessie and James for some reason, and obviously coerced Jongin into putting on a Pokémon trainer costume. And of course, he has barely walked past the front door (thankfully, his sprained ankle and subsequent slight limp are already in the past) when Jongdae hands him a drink, grins, and says, “Your friend is over there.”

When Jongin follows the quick jerk of his head he only sees the back of someone leaning against the makeshift bar talking to a very tall person in very strange clothes, so it’s Yifan he recognizes first. The smaller person wears a costume he can hardly identify at first, but it’s easier from behind, with the simple colors, the roundish shape and the cute little wings.

Jongin’s stomach does a flip. Of course Kyungsoo has been on his mind, for the past three weeks. Not too much, not enough to make him feel bad, just this kind of lost connection after a party with someone he felt like he could really get along with well, if they actually talked more. He’s been thinking about him just in the way of wondering when he’ll see him again, but now that he does, now that he turns just enough that Jongin can see his face, one he’d definitely recognize in a sea of people, he needs to reach to his side and grab Taemin’s arm to steady himself.

“That’s him,” he croaks. “Taemin, shit, that’s him.”

Taemin tries to follow his borderline terrified gaze and squints. “Who?”

 _“Batman!”_ Jongin hisses, leaning closer and then just pulling Taemin away so they get out of Kyungsoo’s potential line of vision. “That was Batman from last month. Kyungsoo. The cute one.”

“Who, the dwarf in the Rowlet costume?”

“Yes.” Jongin only lets go of Taemin’s arm to pick at his own costume and groan. “I can’t believe it happened again.”

“Destiny,” Sehun says from somewhere behind them, completely unaffected, and puts a hand on Jongin’s shoulder. “Come on. We need a battle plan so you get his damn number this time around.”

They don’t actually get that far.

To be fair, it’s hard making a battle plan with people like Sehun and Taemin, especially when there’s drinks, music, and other boys. They get distracted a lot. After Sehun’s witty suggestion to _just walk up to him and tell him to fuck you_ , they at least managed to brainstorm for good Pokémon pickup lines involving balls, but that only ended in all of them arguing about the validity of those since Rowlet is a starter Pokémon and Jongin shouldn’t need balls in the first place, which just sounds bad.

It’s when Taemin turns back from staring after one of the Narutos that both he and Sehun freeze up and fix their gaze on something directly behind Jongin, and Jongin has seen enough rom-coms to know what that means.

Carefully, with an empty plastic cup still in his hand, Jongin turns around to face Kyungsoo. The hood of his costume is pulled back and there’s a smile on his lips, something mischievous and almost predatory on his features, and he opens his mouth to say something, but against the music, Jongin doesn’t catch it. Jongin leans down a little and screams “What?” at him, so Kyungsoo leans up and his breath fans against Jongin’s ear when he speaks up again.

“I said,” he says, his voice a dark rumble fighting with the bass of the song playing, “I told myself I was gonna take you home with me next time I see you, but it’s weird flirting with you now when you’re wearing that.”

Heat creeps up Jongin’s neck way too quickly. He knows what Kyungsoo means; Sehun’s earlier suggestion sounded weird already when he thought too much about how they’re dressed as children’s anime characters, so Jongin pulls back just enough to give Kyungsoo an obvious once-over before he grins at him. “Well why did _you_ pick a Pokémon costume, then?”

Kyungsoo comes closer, probably so he doesn’t have to scream against the music again, but there’s so little space between them now that Jongin feels more than sees him shrug his shoulders, and it makes his head spin just a bit. “I let my friends pick it,” Kyungsoo says, “because I’m stupid and life hates me.”

Maybe this is where the disgruntled Batman image came from, then. Jongin laughs and tries to come up with something to say when he feels someone else lean over his shoulder.

“Obviously you two should take your costumes off,” Taemin says helpfully.

Kyungsoo throws him a look, cold and calculating and in stark contrast with his Rowlet costume, then he looks back at Jongin with a smirk that makes his knees feel weak, and cocks a brow. “The guy’s got a point,” he says. “Wanna get out of here, Trainer Jongin?”

That reaps a loud cackle from Sehun behind them, but Kyungsoo doesn’t even flinch, so neither does Jongin. He just takes the hand Kyungsoo is stretching out towards him, and follows him with nothing but a grin thrown over his shoulder towards his friends.

( _“The guy?”_ Taemin yells after them. “My name’s Taemin! _We’ve met!_ ”)

  


Kyungsoo doesn’t do this often. Taking people home from parties to fuck them. He’s not completely against it, either -- he’s done it a few times, if the person was breathtaking enough, if there was at least some sort of spark, and he usually doesn’t regret it when it happens. It’s just not a very regular occurrence. He’s picky, he supposes, and he’s not always in the mood for mindless sex, he likes his quiet nights in his own space away from his friends, because their parties are fun but Kyungsoo’s patience can only take so much. So for this to happen, you need to impress him.

What’s even rarer for him is asking people out on a proper date. No, he’s not completely against dating either, he likes it, really, he believes in love and all that junk, it’s fine. He’s just not very good at asking people out. Kyungsoo is a big fan of nonverbal communication, he has all those dangerous glares or raunchy eyebrow movements down to a science, but that’s just not enough when you’re trying to make someone go out with you. Really, he found that out the hard way in high school. It’s not called _asking people out_ for nothing, you really have to _ask_ them, and he doesn’t do well with asking people.

Oh, but this one was worth it.

Jongin is cute, definitely, even back in the emergency room Kyungsoo found that he was just the right kind of lost and dorky to be horribly endearing. But last night especially there was the memory of his naked legs, his hands around his plastic cup, the way he moved his hips when he was just walking next to Kyungsoo and the way his lips quirked when he made increasingly questionable jokes about their costumes. Last night especially there was enough of that to leave Kyungsoo unsurprised when he had Jongin’s hands down the back of his pants the second he closed his apartment door behind them.

(Which was a feat in itself, since Kyungsoo’s costume was so wide he was kind of impressed with Jongin for even finding his pants in the first place. He’s talented.)

By the time they had made it to Kyungsoo’s bed they were completely out of their costumes, and that made things a lot easier. For Kyungsoo, but also for Jongin. Maybe Kyungsoo should have figured, after that lap dance story from last month, but he still ended up a little surprised by Jongin’s sheer sexual energy once they were good and naked and pushing each other into Kyungsoo’s mattress until someone gave in.

So Kyungsoo is bad at asking people out. That can mean he's bad at finding the right words, or sometimes it just means he has really terrible timing.

He still had one hand fisted in Jongin's hair (soft still, even with with the hint of sweat on his hairline, how was he doing it?), his breathing still ragged and his ears still ringing when Jongin resurfaced, crawling up on the mattress to face him with a grin that was something along the lines of adventurous and made Kyungsoo's chest flutter, like there wasn't enough flutter already going on from the orgasm he was still trying to recover from. So obviously, clear thought didn't come easy to Kyungsoo at this particular moment, and obviously it all had to climax in him looking at Jongin and opening his mouth and saying, “Do you wanna have breakfast with me later? There's a kimbap shop downstairs.”

Jongin looked at him and blinked, smiling eventually when Kyungsoo managed to soften his hold on his hair and card his fingers through it instead. “Are you taking me on a breakfast date?” Jongin said, which made Kyungsoo properly realize what he just said and might or might not have sent panic into his eyes, because Jongin laughed at him. “I'm just asking because I can still taste your dick on my tongue, you know.”

“Well,” Kyungsoo said loudly, “then buying you breakfast is the least I can do.”

Yeah, this one was worth it.

The little plastic bottle of banana milk looks even tinier in Jongin’s hand, only topped off by the miniscule straw stuck between his lips. (He’s wearing his costume pants and T-shirt, but that’s alright, they alone don’t make him look too much like an anime character.) Kyungsoo watches him a little too intensely while chewing on his kimbap, but it proves to be worth it when he can watch his face contort after what Kyungsoo says next.

“You know there’s another costume party coming up, right?”

Jongin grimaces around his straw, rolls his eyes, then presses them shut while pushing the straw out of his mouth with his tongue, and sighs so loudly he’s turning a few heads behind the store counter. _“Seriously?”_ he says. “What’s _up_ with them?”

“I’m at least half sure they’re trying to test out how many costumes they can force us in,” Kyungsoo declares, acting like he’s not about to use this for his advantage. He grins. “How about you beat them to it and squeeze yourself back into your Robin cape?”

Jongin blinks at him over his milk bottle. “If,” he says slowly, “that means you’ll put your Batman mask back on?”

“Sure,” says Kyungsoo.

So for the next messed up costume party, when people point at them and ask if they belong together, they smile and they say yes.

  


“Hey,” Kyungsoo says. “Do you actually know anything about Batman?”

“No. You?”

“Not a clue.”


End file.
